Dear Mike Huckabee

Discussion of rape and rape culture ahead.

"Ethel Waters, for example, was the result of a forcible rape," Huckabee said of the late American gospel singer. One-time presidential candidate Huckabee added: "I used to work for James Robison back in the 1970s, he leads a large Christian organization. He, himself, was the result of a forcible rape. And so I know it happens, and yet even from those horrible, horrible tragedies of rape, which are inexcusable and indefensible, life has come and sometimes, you know, those people are able to do extraordinary things."
-Mike Huckabee

Dear Mike Huckabee,

Before we go any farther, stop saying "forcible rape."  Just say "rape."  The term "forcible rape" makes it seem as if there's "forcible rape," which is the bad, violent kind, and then there's other rape, you know, not rape-rape, just sort-of-rape, it wasn't really forcible or anything, she just wasn't that into it, you know how women are.

With that out of the way, let's examine the rest of that dreck.

Right, so basically you're saying that "some people make the best of a bad situation."  Or, "the sperm of rapists isn't automatically contaminated with evil."  Or something.  What's your point here?  Yes, some people grow up to "do extraordinary things."  That's terrific!  I agree!

Here's the thing about that "life has come" part.  "Life has come" is a really vague way to gloss over the fact that someone had to endure nine months of pregnancy followed by labor (and we all know what a sweet little tea party that always is).  And then someone (most often the person who just did the whole pregnancy-and-labor thing) has to rear the child.  For a long time.

What you said, that sometimes people who have been raped become pregnant and bear children, and sometimes those children grow up to become professional Christians, is a fact.  It is not an argument.  (Although you were speaking with Todd Akin at the time, so, "Yes, you fool, sometimes people do get pregnant from being raped" is, unfortunately, not taken for granted.)

It is true that people conceived through rape may contribute positively to the world.  It's not as if the seed of rapists is sown in Lucifer's garden or anything.  It's not as if "I must rape" is encoded into the chromosomes somewhere, just waiting for the next generation.  No one's suggesting that we're suffering an epidemic of rape babies growing up to be a drain on society.

But let's look at why someone who's been raped may not want to continue a pregnancy.

1.) Well, you were just raped, so you're probably going through a lot right now, so dealing with that and taking care of yourself comes first.

2.) The pregnancy may be a constant reminder of the assault you've just suffered.

3.) Being raped involves a loss of control, an inability to stop someone else from using your body.  A pregnancy can be uncomfortably similar at a time when you want to reestablish control.

4.) As you probably weren't planning to be raped and become pregnant, you probably weren't preparing your life for child-rearing.  You may not be ready for pregnancy or parenthood, financially or physically or otherwise.

5.) You may be married or have a significant other who is unwilling to help you to rear your rapist's child.

6.) People are going to ask who the father is.

7.) The child is going to ask who the father is.

8.) What if the father wants visitation rights?  What if he pops up five years down the road and tries to involve himself in your child's life?  Statistically speaking, you were probably raped by someone you know.  You can only guess how he'll react if he realizes that the child is his.  Even if he doesn't get involved initially, he has the rest of the child's life to change his mind.

9.) Along with the "raped by someone you know" part comes the fact that you may know the rapist's significant other, the rapist's children, etc.  You may be a member of the rapist's family.

10.) If you're one of the few who ends up seeing a rapist on trial, I can only imagine how the defense will twist "but she's carrying his baby!" into an argument that it wasn't really rape.

There's a lot more, but you get the gist of it.  While you may think of pregnancy as the potential for another wonderful Christian in the world, the actual rape victim has a much more complex understanding of the situation.  You can pat yourself on the back for acknowledging how indefensible "forcible" rape is, but maybe if you had more feminists who fight the rape culture and work for reproductive rights on your show, and fewer people like Todd Akin, you'd be more respectful of what real survivors go through.

With love,
Frank Lee

Dear Mitt Romney

"We had a moment of silence in honor of the people who lost their lives at that sheik temple. I noted that it was a tragedy for many, many reasons. Among them are the fact that people, the sheik people, are among the most peaceable and loving individuals you can imagine, as is their faith."
—Mitt Romney

Dear Mitt Romney,

I would like someone running for President of the United States of America to be a good orator.  A skilled public speaker.  Someone who doesn't make embarrassing gaffes, particularly in regards to a domestic terrorist act.

I would like someone running for POTUS to be well-educated enough to know the correct terms for various types of citizens, including religious minorities.

You're running for POTUS right now.  At this very moment!  I would like you to be smart as well as sensitive to the issues affecting your people.

One of the problems relevant to this very terrorist act is the conflation of people of color.  The conflation of religious groups.  If you're an angry white man with notions of white supremacy and Christian supremacy filling your head, you might not know the difference between Muslim and Sikh.  You probably don't care.  You're full of fear and hate and everything the patriarchy's been pumping into you since birth, and you're ready for action.  You don't care who that action hurts.  They're people of color who dare not to be Christian, and that's enough for you.  Muslim, Sikh, what's the difference?  Sikh, sheik, what's the difference?  They're not like you, right?  They're interchangeable and incomprehensible anyway.

What you said fed right into that.  It rang those very same bells.

Maybe you spoke out of ignorance, but this isn't the time for ignorance.  This isn't a time for insensitivity.  This isn't a time for mistakes and gaffes.  This is a time when it's very important to get it right, as right as we can.

I hope that you become a compassionate, thoughtful man and a silver-tongued orator, and I wish you well in the pursuit of that goal.  But I hope that someone who's already a step ahead of you in the not-being-racist department becomes the next POTUS.

With love,
Frank Lee

Dear Pat Robertson

Dear Pat Robertson,

Recently, you said some pretty ridiculous things about a terrorist act.  Violent tragedies which expose some of the nastiest problems in our national culture are not the best place to make ridiculous statements, so I hope that you'll ponder your mistakes and strive to speak more appropriately in the future.

Let's look at some of the bullshit you went with this time:

...televangelist Pat Robertson came to the conclusion that Sunday morning’s Sikh temple massacre in Oak Creek, Wisc., was ultimately because “atheists hate God.”

“What is it?” Robertson wondered aloud. “Is it satanic? Is it some spiritual thing?”

“People who are atheists, they hate God, they hate the expression of God,” he continued. “And they are angry with the world, angry with themselves, angry with society and they take it out on innocent people who are worshipping God.”

First, atheists don't hate God.  Atheists don't believe in God.  Atheism is defined by a lack of belief.  There is no deity for them to hate.  I don't hate the tooth fairy; there is no tooth fairy.  I don't hate the Easter bunny; there is no Easter bunny.  I don't hate Zeus.  There is no Zeus.  There's nothing for me to hate.

Do atheists hate Christians?  I'm sure that some of them do.  And a lot of Christians have given them plenty of good reason for it.  Frankly, you're not exactly helping.

Why, precisely, do you think that atheists hating God is at all related to Satan?  Are you trying to say that atheists worship and obey Satan?  You do understand, I hope, that since atheists are defined by their lack of belief, they don't believe in Satan, either?  They don't worship Satan.  If they did, they wouldn't be atheists.  Maybe you're implying that they're innocently and helplessly being used by Satan in some sort of anti-Christian plot?  Okay, that's possible; I have no idea what Satan's up to these days.  But that wouldn't be their fault, it would be Satan's fault; they'd just be pawns in some merciless game.

Here's the problem with that theory, though: it removes human agency.  It erases the motives of the actual killer.  It ignores all of the cultural and systemic problems which played into what happened.  It permits us as a nation to wash our hands of the entire issue and pretend that nothing could've been done to prevent the tragedy.  It discourages us from taking steps to prevent it from happening again.

Atheists are not angry.  No angrier than anyone else, I'd imagine.  Do you have independent and verifiable research?  If there are any scientific results which point to atheists being significantly unhappy, can you prove that it's not because they live in a nation filled with Christian supremacy and nationally known figures like you who blame them for terrorist acts?  If people pointed the finger at me every time a national tragedy (whether natural or otherwise) occurred, I'd be pretty testy, too.

Any more words of wisdom for us?

“Whether it’s a Sikh temple, or a Baptist church, or a Catholic church, or a Muslim mosque — whatever it is — I just abhor this kind of violence, and it’s the the kind of thing that we should do something about,” he said. “But what do you do? Well, you talk about the love of God and hope it has some impact,” the TV preacher recommended.

Those things are not equal.  Not in this country.  Not in a culture where Christianity reigns.  It's appalling, disgusting, abhorrent, that in commenting on a terrorist act which specifically targeted a minority religion and a temple full of people of color you're acting as if it were just the same as if a white Baptist church had been attacked.

When an abortion clinic is bombed, do you compare it to Johns Hopkins being bombed and shake your head in regret that anti-healthcare people are at it again?  You are deliberately misrepresenting what has happened.  This is not a case where any old generic house of worship was attacked and any old congregants were killed.  In a majority Christian nation, a non-Christian religion was targeted.  In a racist nation, people of color were targeted.  This is not about atheism, but you got one thing right: this is about hatred.  And fear.  And the lies we tell about Christianity being under assault.  And the lies we tell about white men being in more danger than anyone else; being in danger from everyone else.

What is particularly striking about Robertson’s conclusion is that, as of yet, there has been no evidence that the alleged gunman Wade Michael Page was an atheist. In fact, neo-Nazism and white supremacy movements often encompass a form of Christianity that emphasizes racial purity and nationalism.

 Got that?  "A form of Christianity that emphasizes racial purity and nationalism."

Christianity emphasizing racial purity and nationalism.

Neo-Nazi.  White power.  Christianity.

You blame atheists as if nonbelievers are the problem.  You blame Satan as if all-powerful figures are at work and we're helpless to do anything about it.  You skew a terrorist act as if Christians are under attack.  As if Christians aren't often the terrorists themselves.

The narrative that Christianity is under attack is part of the problem.  Pointing the finger at anyone else, everyone else, from people who aren't like you to mythical figures, isn't going to solve the problem.  I'd like to solve the problem.  I hope that someday soon you do, too, because your voice reaches more ears than mine, and it's going to take a lot of us to make a difference.

With love,
Frank Lee

Dear First Baptist Church of Crystal Springs

Dear First Baptist Church of Crystal Springs,

I've heard that you recently coerced your pastor not to perform a wedding in your church because the bride and groom were black.  The couple in question, Charles and Te'Andrea Wilson, attended your church regularly and had already finalized plans with the pastor, but you didn't want a black couple's wedding to be performed at your church so the pastor performed the ceremony in another church instead.

As you can imagine, I find your racism to be absolutely disgusting.

The Wilsons have attended your church.  You'll share the Word and break bread with them, but you won't allow them to get married in your church?  Some churches don't perform the ceremony for non-members, but that doesn't seem to be the case here.  Your specific problem seems to be that the Wilsons are black.  And you were willing to eject your pastor from the church entirely to get what you wanted.

"The church congregation had decided no black could be married at that church, and that if he went on to marry her, then they would vote [the pastor] out the church," said Charles Wilson.

I've been made to understand that, within the bounds of Christianity, marriage is a sacred covenant with God.  It's certainly touted as a wholesome and beautiful sacrament.  Why would you not want this good, Christian ceremony to be performed within your church?  Presumably you permit white people to wed there.  So it's only for people of color that this becomes an issue.  Such a grave issue, in fact, that you'd fire your pastor over it.

I would assume that, as Christians, you believe a Christian marriage to be a good thing.  But it's not a good thing when black people do it.  It's such an intolerable abomination that it must not come to pass before your altar, certainly.  I wonder if you realize how intensely hateful you're being or what a hideously racist message you're sending.  No matter how Christian they consider themselves, black people aren't Christian enough to get married at your church.  Generally, the task of Christians is to evangelize, to bring more people to God, to spread the Word, to share the good news of Jesus Christ and His message for us.  Instead, you're turning people away.  Shoving them aside, rejecting them and anyone who supports them.  You're treating them as inherently not good enough to be Christian, too sinful to be cleansed.  Their skin is too dark for you.  Their souls are too dirty for Jesus.

Denying someone's God's love is about as hateful as a Christian can get.

I hope that you come to understand exactly how atrocious your behavior is and exactly how damaging your mindset is.  I hope that you learn to accept all of God's children into your church.  I hope that you learn to love.

I hope that the Wilsons enjoy a very happy marriage.

With love,
Frank Lee

Dear Chik-fil-A

“We are very much supportive of the family – the biblical definition of the family unit. We are a family-owned business, a family-led business, and we are married to our first wives. We give God thanks for that.”
-Dan Cathy, founder, Chik-fil-A

Dear Chik-fil-A,

Glad to hear that you're so happy in your marriages.

I'm puzzled by your recent homophobic statement about "the biblical definition of the family unit."  What exactly do you think that the Bible's definition of "family" is?

Of all of the books of the Bible, I didn't notice Dictionary being one of them.  When I did a search for the word "family" in general, I got 205 results.  Try it for yourself!

Aside from the typical stuff about someone wiping out an entire family because God desired it, I found some interesting, sometimes conflicting information.

For one thing, people seem very concerned with building a family

Genesis 16:2
New International Version (NIV)
2 so she said to Abram, “The Lord has kept me from having children. Go, sleep with my slave; perhaps I can build a family through her.”

Abram agreed to what Sarai said.

Genesis 30:3
New International Version (NIV)
3 Then she said, “Here is Bilhah, my servant. Sleep with her so that she can bear children for me and I too can build a family through her.”

 and preserving the family line

Genesis 19:32
New International Version (NIV)
32 Let’s get our father to drink wine and then sleep with him and preserve our family line through our father.”

Genesis 19:34
New International Version (NIV)
34 The next day the older daughter said to the younger, “Last night I slept with my father. Let’s get him to drink wine again tonight, and you go in and sleep with him so we can preserve our family line through our father.”

at all costs.

Here's a note on familial duty:

Deuteronomy 25:5
New International Version (NIV)
5 If brothers are living together and one of them dies without a son, his widow must not marry outside the family. Her husband’s brother shall take her and marry her and fulfill the duty of a brother-in-law to her.

Who, exactly, is a member of the family?

Judges 11:2
New International Version (NIV)
2 Gilead’s wife also bore him sons, and when they were grown up, they drove Jephthah away. “You are not going to get any inheritance in our family,” they said, “because you are the son of another woman.”

Proverbs 17:2
New International Version (NIV)
2 A prudent servant will rule over a disgraceful son
    and will share the inheritance as one of the family.

John 8:35
New International Version (NIV)
35 Now a slave has no permanent place in the family, but a son belongs to it forever.

Are women, wives, daughters, important members of the family?

Jeremiah 35:3
New International Version (NIV)
3 So I went to get Jaazaniah son of Jeremiah, the son of Habazziniah, and his brothers and all his sons—the whole family of the Rekabites.

How large is a typical family?  How many wives do you have?

1 Chronicles 7:4
New International Version (NIV)
4 According to their family genealogy, they had 36,000 men ready for battle, for they had many wives and children.

I don't know.  I don't see a definition of family here, but I do see a lot of signs that you should do anything and everything to procreate wildly.  It's great that you're still married to your first wives, but you might want to add in at least a second and third if you really want to be biblical about it.

With love,
Frank Lee

Edited to add: click here, please.